Is it finishing that presentation? Strengthening your relationship with a friend or partner? Getting the kids to bed on time? Pinpoint what success would look like-and see yourself achieving it. “Combine a positive attitude with an honest evaluation of the challenges you may meet along your path,” she writes for Huffington Post.įirst: Recognize what you want to accomplish. So, how do you practice realistic optimism IRL? Mara Karpel, Ph.D., says it starts with getting intentional about mixing the two perspectives. ‘Believing that the road to success will be rocky leads to greater success because it forces you to take action.’- Heidi Grant, Ph.D. “People who are confident that they will succeed, and equally confident that success won’t come easily, put in more effort, plan how they’ll deal with problems before they arise, and persist longer in the face of difficulty.” “Believing that the road to success will be rocky leads to greater success because it forces you to take action,” she writes. And that belief actually sets us up for more success. The key difference between the two: With realistic optimism, we believe we can succeed-but we accept that it might be tough. This kind of mindset, Grant explains, is much more beneficial than being an unrealistic optimist. This preparation only increases their confidence in their own ability to get things done.”īasically, it’s knowing your goal, trusting it can come true, but knowing it’ll happen because of your ability to put in the work and overcome inevitable obstacles. “They recognize the need for giving serious thought to how they will deal with obstacles. “Realistic optimists.believe they will succeed, but also believe they have to make success happen-through things like effort, careful planning, persistence, and choosing the right strategies,” Heidi Grant, Ph.D., explains in the Harvard Business Review. Realistic optimists believe in their power to make good things happen, even through rough conditions. While realistic optimists believe in their power to make good things happen, even through rough conditions. It gives us the motivation and confidence we need to go after the things we seek.īut there are two ways to be an optimist: Unrealistic optimists believe good things will just happen-with less focus on their agency. Optimism isn’t just a good thing-it’s a necessary thing. It’s called realistic optimism-and it's so powerful, here at Shine we're renaming Positive Thinking Day (September 13) to Realistic Optimism Day. We have over 50,000 thoughts each day, and it's estimated that 70 to 80% of those thoughts are negative.īut it turns out, there’s a middle ground that’s actually better to aim for-one that’s not all “happy thoughts only” but still maintains hope for the best.
We're not wired to be in the "think happy thoughts only" camp. We have over 50,000 thoughts each day, and it's estimated that 70 to 80% of those thoughts are negative.
The answer: I'm not alone in my negative thinking tendencies. Why would I pretend that everything is going to be all effortless rainbows and sunshine, when I’ve been around the block enough to know that’s rarely the case? But it also gives me optimistic FOMO, leaving me worried (of course)-is everyone positive thinking without me? Or, one of its cousins: “Just don’t think about the negative.” “Can’t you just not think about bad things?”Īs a worrier, it all seems a bit counterintuitive. As someone with anxiety, I’ve heard that piece of well-intended advice a few times.
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